On being a Foreign Filipino

Born to be a citizen of the world!

Note: These are my own personal observations. There are many exceptional Filipinos who are exactly that –an exception. They inspire me.

Before I begin this entry I would like to make a disclosure. I’m a full Filipina who was born in Jakarta, Indonesia where I lived for almost seven years. My family moved back to the Philippines in 1996 where I was raised in an international school environment on a scholarship. Upon hearing about my high school background I often get asked this question: Why didn’t you study abroad?

While I got accepted to colleges I wanted in the United States with partial scholarships, I usually give two reasons for my decision to study here. Firstly, the admission was still too expensive and secondly, I wanted to get to know my Filipino roots. Given that I had lived in my home country for almost 10 years then, I know that the second sentiment might appear off. That’s why I often jokingly refer to myself as a ‘foreign Filipina,’ a pseudo existential identity crisis I apply to most third-culture kids who were raised exposed to cultures different from their own. Perhaps back then it was an empty excuse I easily gave whenever I preferred not to explain in detail why I didn’t fulfill that dream of going abroad. But even if it has taken me almost four years to, it’s finally becoming a commitment, which is why I’ve decided to speak out about my story now.

The quality of education, among other things, is always perceived to be greener beyond the Philippine archipelago. After all we are a poor developing country weathered by many man-made disasters. Agreed, that’s our present predicament, but we’re always using that as an excuse, one that ultimately blinds and prevents people from seeing opportunity and changing reality into a better one.

Why not study in the Philippines? Since college began I realized that no has ever asked me that question.

College has definitely ‘socialized’ me more into Filipino culture from appreciating our mababaw sense of humor, finding my way round Manila with our crazy commuting system, eating at street karenderias to travelling to different places around Visayas and Mindanao. Now I’m imbibed with a sense of nationalism I honestly never thought I would acquire.

With the new Department of Tourism ‘It’s More Fun in the Philippines’ campaign, I was originally inspired to write a list of reasons why it is for a blog entry. But after reading two insightful entries written by Marion Waller and Scott Allford, which have been circling online about the negative perception of the Philippines, I feel called to write about the deeper issue propelling the campaign. The most striking sentiment shared among Filipinos online is this: How come the foreigners, who don’t have the geographical or national inclination to, see and appreciate the Philippines in a way that Filipinos didn’t.

Maybe most of us are ‘foreign Filipinos.’

“He understood only too well the compulsive attraction of totalitarianism among the intellectuals. Because he was an intellectual himself, he resisted that compulsion courageously and consistently.”

That’s an excerpt from F. Sionil Jose foreword in Max Soliven’s biography ‘The Man and the Journalist.’ I noted that quote down because it reminds me of the privilege and responsibility of being educated among the intellectuals. Indeed knowledge is power, but we shouldn’t let it get to our heads and prevent us from not only using our minds to think but of our hands and feet.

I remember that during our outreach programs in high school it was always the foreigners who readily got down on all fours to clean the dirty floors of the dinky bathrooms of public high schools, while the upper-middle class Filipinos usually hesitated. Even in immersion programs in Ateneo it’s the same problem of getting Filipino students to not only care but to act afterwards. While any college in the Philippines is probably more Filipino than my international high school it’s the same nonchalance across social class.

At first glance the excellent and exciting #ItsMoreFunInThePhilippines campaign is meant to address the lack of nationalism among Filipinos. Since the overwhelming response of the campaign is obviously filled with a sense of pride, how can people criticize us for not having any? But I realized that maybe the root problem is not of apathy but of blind complacency. As the texting and social media capital of the world, the trouble is not in sparking sentiment but being perpetually stuck in it.  Maybe the Philippines has a hard time moving forward because this blindness is endemic – to what and how the Philippine’s can offer the world; to what countless of foreigners see that we Filipinos don’t. It’s striking how Filpino students eagerly want to spend a semester abroad when they need the cultural awakening in their own country.

I’ve accepted that I’m a foreign Filipina. I cannot disregard my background the way that the Philippines cannot ignore our history of colonization under the Americans and Spaniards. Indeed we are a mixed culture, but remember it’s both of ‘foreign’ and ‘Filipino’ origin.

I remember what Jim Paredes once told our class. “To be international, you have to be local.” As a country that prides itself for its English speaking capabilities, that can be our competitive edge in an age of globalization. It only means we have more access to the rest of the world to speak about who we are.

So, why not study in the Philippines? If I had never chosen to stay, then I would have nothing to say and  I’ve only just begun to open my eyes and learn. My education would go to waste if I didn’t.

Beyond stress and success: The story of a Social Media Summit

ACOMM's Social Media Summit Team, December 10, 2011

The holiday season is a time to give thanks. If Christmas feels warm and fuzzy, then New Years is appreciative for the chance to start anew.Throughout the year I always try to be thankful for my blessings. They come in all shapes and sizes, through the people I meet, opportunities I grab, and the shortcomings that come my way. While this particular project could have happened during any other time in the year, it’s quite appropriate that ACOMM’s Social Media Summit took place near the holiday season. Gratitude is the best way I can encapsulate this project into a nutshell. A very big nutshell.

I have about 6 months worth of stories I could share about the work, adventures, shortcomings and success of this project, but I would like to focus on the most personal aspect — my team, because these people have made all the difference.

Surviving on adrenaline!

As part of council I’ve been planning events since high school. Since I was young and inexperienced then, I had no idea what the hell I was doing most of the time. Although that was more than 4 years ago, I still remember feeling nervous and mostly alone. That was me back then,  a girl with a super-woman complex. I created my own kryptonite — myself and most probably my ego.

My super team of lovely ladies. The crazier the pose, the more stressed you were!

Even if prom went well, or we managed to pull off that fashion show benefit, now I can hardly recall feeling genuinely fulfilled afterwards. It was a faceless success. No warm and fuzzy feeling afterwards. No yearning for what we could do next. Looking back now, I’m hesitant to call us a team. Where are my fond memories aside from stress and success?

We had a total of over 60 students attend from different high school and colleges

Fast forward more than four years later. Although I’m better equipped with experience, planning this Social Media Summit was challenging for me. Like high school, I wasn’t 100% sure of what I was doing. I’ve never done anything like this in scale or form before. Maybe none of us really knew, but the problem is that I’m a pusher. It’s difficult to know when to halt ambition. As the project head, it’s risky because you’re responsible for putting others on the line as well.  I know, I’m not a teenager anymore.

I remember confiding in Kevin, my Associate Vice President, that I was scared of disappointing everyone. He repeated the same advice I once told him before. Start worrying if you’re not worrying.

The organizers with Ms. Maria Ressa during break

One day I hope to be just as accomplished, inspirational and influential as Ms. Maria Ressa is.

“Over prepare, then go with the flow”

I think that quote best describes what happened towards the end, especially on the day itself when a lot of things didn’t go according to plan, both in a good and bad way. I was a stressed-out and sleepless wreck, trying to compose myself minutes before giving my opening remarks. I had no speech prepared, a situation I tried to avoid, especially since I did not want to embarrass myself in front of  someone I really looked up to. She was sitting in the front row. However, we were already behind schedule and I couldn’t buy any more time. So I did the only thing one can and should always do — speak from the heart, for myself and the team. No amount of preparation compares to the reassurance from inside and the people around you.

The lovely ladies of SMS

A prayer of thanks.

This project was a first on many different levels. Yes, for the most part, we didn’t know what the hell we were doing and we were just learning as we went along, but unlike before I was not alone.  We were not alone.

After the attendees left everyone held hands in prayer. I looked around at the people who were not there when we first started planning in July. From less than 10 in our original team, we were almost 30 organizers that day, helping each other out. Aside from my project managers who were required to be there, I saw the faces of my executive board, members from the other departments, my org. That’s when I felt what I didn’t in high school.

Thank you to everyone who made this possible and everyone who I got closer to because of this event. You know who you are. : )

Read our post-event article by Joey Alarilla on Yahoo Philippines here


Jen hates it when I call her Little J. I think I can get away with it, not because I'm her boss, but because we've become friends :)

It was awesome how we live-tweeted the whole event. Bernice practicing for her future career in journalism. It works! Within 24 hours, 426 tweets used the hashtag #SocialMediaSummit, generating 1,384,351 impressions and reaching an audience of 168,012 Twitter followers via hashtracking.com.

Anyone, regardless of background, uses social media.

In the afternoon we broke into 3 workshop sessions in order to put theory into practice

Another "live feed" of the event

Someone wrote on the evaluation sheet "ACOMM is the org that young people can depend on" <3

Abby and Nika leading the workshops

Lauren and I -- still the dynamic duo even if we head different departments now.

Laughing and learning -- always a good combination

Thank you to our awesome speakers who really were our bread and butter. So thankful to have them! (First row: Mike Palacios, Rowena Palacios, Candice Montenegro; Second row: Pedrosa Pilar, Joey Alarilla, Maria Ressa; Third row: Ivan Henares, Jim Paredes

Hey Social Media Gang, Class of 2011!

Hey Social Media Gang, Class of 2011!

Five days left until ACOMM’s first ever Social Media Summit on December 10!

ACOMM with Yahoo! Philippines presents “Time Out: Is social media changing the online playground?” We want you to join our Social Media Summit and find out!

Social Media Summit is a whole day event where a series of talks and workshops will be conducted by prominent media practitioners and social media experts to Ateneans, and invited delegates from chosen high school and colleges.

Our theme “Time Out” revolves around the idea that the Internet is like an online playground where rules of social media etiquette are simultaneously broken and built by the citizens who play around and experiment in it. Through this event, ACOMM wants to take the “Time Out” to empower its participants to think critically and act responsibly about various issues that have been emerging.

Hear from our upperclassmen:

The Heavyweight Kid: MARIA RESSA
Former CNN Jakarta Bureau Chief and former Senior Vice President, ABS-CBN News & Current Affairs, Author-in-Residence, International Centre for Political Violence & Terrorism Research
The Digital Diet: Is too much information bad for your health?

The Hyperactive Kid: JOEY ALARILLA
Yahoo! Philippines South East Asia Head of Social & Community
So Many Tabs, So Little Time: Are we expanding our grasp or spreading ourselves too thin?

The Delinquent: JIM PAREDES
Formerly with APO Hiking Society
Voted Best Personal Blog in the 2009 Philippine Blog Awards
Catch me if you can: Can you get away with social media?

The Popular Kid: PILAR PEDROSA PILAR
Blogs on itouchthings.tumblr.com (Over 5,000 followers)
15 Likes to Fame: Are you #Trending now?

The Tattletale: CANDICE MONTENEGRO
Multimedia producer for GMA News Online.
The News Doesn’t Break. It Tweet: Is the truth on twitter?

The Bully: ROWENA AZADA-PALACIOS
Philosophy Professor, ADMU
Burn Book 2.0: Is social media a bully-free zone?

The Hustler: IVAN HENARES
Blogger Friendly: Does social media use you?
Best Travel Blog at the 2007 Philippine Blog Awards
ivanhenares.com

Apply now! Limited slots per school. Priority will be given to those who can pay ahead of time. Details of the procedures below. Check out the album for more details of each topic!

Program Flow: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xMpED9NcTAb1GOl6vbPPbpiG4o67O4MgrEcJplxqug0/edit

Application Form: http://tinyurl.com/SocialMediaSummitApp

Application Fee: P300. (Inclusive of food & kits)
Late application and payment fee on or before Nov. 30: P320
Late application and payment fee after Nov.30: P350

Payment Procedures: http://tiny.cc/SMSPaymentProcedures

Attire: SMART CASUAL

For questions email us at sms.ateneo@gmail.com :)

* For the teachers accompanying the high school students, you have the option to become a delegate by applying and paying, or to attend the summit for free but food will not be provided.

Yahoo! Philippines pre-event article

Love the teacher, hate the QPI

BV likes company. Mara & I after a particularly bad week.

One afternoon in Starbucks when I was sulking about my crappy academic performance to Lena I remember her telling me something like: Ikaw kasi, you always have to make it harder for yourself. You get the hard teachers and take Saturday classes.

Case and point: 3 things that unfortunately made my second semester junior year memorable

1. Getting kicked out of Fr. Dacanay’s class because that one time I wasn’t prepared for class was the day he decided to ask me a question that I didn’t know the answer to.

Although, yes, he’s known for throwing students out, I promise that no, I really am not a bad student and I hope that my subsequent sentence of defense doesn’t come off as whiny or that I’m making an excuse. He just caught me at a particular hellish week of school. Lesson learned. That little voice in my head now sounds like Fr. Dacanay.

2. Failing a test/ actual fear of failing a subject aka Philippine history with Fr. Arcillia despite intense efforts at studying. Do. Not. Take. Him. Ever. I hate having to succumb to the mediocre standards of  ”I just want to pass” mentality. He is intelligent, but he’s terrible at teaching and a beast with grading.

3. No matter how great Ms. Nanagas is and how much I learned in integrated marketing communication, I am reconsidering taking Saturday classes in the future. I realized how much I wanted my weekend back for sleeping in.

Despite knowing how particularly hellish second sem would be for communication juniors I took these classes/ teachers out of choice. What the heck was I thinking right? Either I’m an idiot or overly ambitious (or stuck with the last batch of enlistment)

But now that junior year is officially over and done with and my finals week has happily been thrown in the trash can, in retrospect I did learn a lot. Although I might sound like a nerd, while studying for finals at 3 in the morning with my eyes just begging for sleep, it’s actually amazing/enjoyable to see the subject in its entirety, how each component of the subject progressively work towards putting together the bigger picture and that you’ve actually retained the past lessons. That’s the point of school isn’t it it?

Well, it helps when you have good teachers who can lovingly drill and/or inspire their lectures into your brain. Luckily I did for all my subjects sans that dictator of a history teacher. Most of the time their nuggets of wisdom, insight and knowledge are more valuable than the sleep you sometimes lose for them and the grades you slave over to get from them.

I may not love my incoming QPI but if there’s one thing i loved were my teachers.

"If you can say it in a nutshell, then it should stay in a nutshell"

Philosophy, Dr. Garcia

Although a little incomprehensible at times, Doc G’s lectures made an impression on me the way only genuine teachers can. 2 semesters with this kind hearted sensai/yoda-like teacher & err verbose/eloquent classmates made learning philosophy enjoyable & memorable!

Kinda sad that it’s over, but hey at least i genuinely learned something! Like that “garaponating” is not a real word HAHA

A classmate giving an example about sex: "When you have sex.." Fr. D: "Can you please change your pronoun. I can't have sex"

Theology, Fr. Dacanay

I would’ve taken a picture with Fr. Dacanay after my orals except it’s hard to when you have a face like that staring back at you.

Fr. Dacanay is a legend for a reason. What I look forward to about his class is not only his extremely interesting insights and lectures but his hilarious stories and wisecracking side-comments! He is definitely a character, particularly one that looks like a Simpsons character. You will never get bored in class. Ever. I never was.

"Learn the rules like a master, then break them like an artist"

Jim Paredes, Issues in Presentation and Performance

Although his class is not as academically heavy as the rest of my subjects, learning from Jim Paredes is like learning about life. He is genuinely such an inspiring and dynamic person filled with all kinds of good vibrations. I enjoyed his class because like me, he knows the value of spirituality. How many teachers send you an email about an upcoming gig that we might enjoy or invites you back to his house to jam?

Too many quotable quotes from his class.

IMC is like a philosophy for life.

Integrated Marketing Communications, Ms. Nanagas

You know that a class has changed the way you look at things when you’re sitting in the dentist’s office and unconsciously start thinking about all the brand contact points that make the experience actually enjoyable.

Although it got pretty redundant towards the end, Ms. Nanagas is the perfect teacher to teach IMC. She knows her consumer/students, which is why despite her strands of silver hair, she talks to us in a lingo that we young kids can understand.

The Best of Both Worlds – On internationalism, OPM & my life

I’m taking Jim Paredes’ class “Issues in presentation and performance” right now and our topic is world music and OPM. During our last class he was discussing the Philippine music industry over the years until present and what it takes for OPM to truly make it big outside of the Philippines.

Like all of his lectures it was really interesting and insightful. His point in a nutshell was that although Filpinos are obviously brimming in talent (hello college band scene!), the reason why we haven’t struck a chord in the international music scene is that the music that truly represents who the filipino is never gets the opportunity to be heard which ironically is the edge we need to ever get there. The industry is too concerned being marketeers than musicians.

According to him “Anak” by Freddie Aguilar was one of the very few Filipino songs to have ever gained international acclaim and translated in different languages. And… it was in tagalog.

I’m not going to get into the whole profit oriented bullcrap that drives much of society but he did leave us with this statement to ponder on: “To be international you have to be local.” We had to write a 2 page reflection paper on it. Although I kind of crammed mine the words flowed pretty easily. So, I decided to post it here. Voila, instant blog post!

The Best of Both Worlds – On internationalism, OPM and my life

Have you ever felt like a foreigner in your own country? I have.

I may look like a Filipina on the outside, with my morena skin and brown eyes, but my twang and outspoken nature immediately gives me away. Up close I sound and act like a Westerner.

So the statement “To be international you have to be local” puts me in a difficult yet interesting position. I am Filipino by blood but I was born and grew up in Indonesia up until I was seven years old. Although I came back to the Philippines afterwards I went to two international schools – Reedley and ISManila, both of which gave my upbringing a relatively more Western touch. Studying in Ateneo for college is the closest experience I’ve had to discovering my own roots which is one of the primary reasons why I chose to take my undergraduate degree in the Philippines in the first place.

Because of my background I always felt like I was stuck in between two worlds, that of the international arena and the Philippines. My middle ground meant that I was never completely the identity of the other which I felt was both an edge and disadvantage. Admittedly, I don’t think I’ll ever completely relate with my Filipino friends who have been immersed in the culture their whole lives.  But with my international school community where a tolerance and respect for multiculturalism is abundant it is precisely because I am a Filpino that I can.

What makes studying in an international school unique and interesting is your cultural identity. Although we are all different nationalities it is actually in this diversity where we find unity. Our mindset is trained to engage in an open exchange where each barters their own cultural values, ideas and experiences to learn from the other. This open mindedness is essentially what binds all international kids regardless of where they came from. At the end of the day that’s what makes us proud.

So, in response to the statement “To be international you have to be local” I completely agree. Although I may have started on the opposite end of the question where I was born into an international world first rather than starting out as a local, the question surprisingly still works both ways. Rather than looking at my situation as being stuck in between two worlds, I find that I can get the best of both instead.

Internationalism is the coming together of different nationalities who have their own cultural identity. In this light being local presupposes being international which in relation to what we discussed in class is lacking in the Philippine music industry. There’s an abundance of OPM in the country that never gets recognized because the top dogs think that marketing imitators is what will make our mark in the international arena. Perhaps our talent will be recognized worldwide, like what happened to Charice Pempengco, but our identity won’t and it’s rare that it has. In the long run that is what will make the difference.

Similar to my own experience, if the music industry in the Philippines can truly play to the tune of “To be international you have to be local”, then maybe OPM can finally have the best of both worlds too.

Food for thought

This is why I love my Sunday's.

The first week of second semester, junior year has officially come and gone. Although I can’t seem to recall exactly what I did all those past first-week-of-semester-days, this one felt like the best one yet. It feels like a food-for-thought and not a food-for-fat kind of semester. I want to feed my mind and not just my belly that never seems to go away.

Here are a couple of reasons why:

Firstly, despite their impending workload and potentially hard grading system, I love my teachers and the kind of work ethic of which they preach. I’m a sucker for teachers who are great educators.

Although I’ve been called crazy by a few people for doing this, I was able to successfully load rev into the legendary Fr. Dacanay’s Theology class. 2 classes in and I have no regrets. Sure he looks intimidating from afar (or up close given that I’ve made a personal trip to his office regarding transferring), but the moment he starts lecturing you forget the intimidation because it turns into an education that you won’t forget, probably for the rest of your life.

I also have Jim Paredes for my com elective. Although our classes have yet to begin, I’m excited. I have no idea whether I’ll learn anything academic in class, because some have told me that it’s boring, but I’m secretly a fan girl. I want to learn from someone who lives, breathes and writes his ideals.

Then there’s Integrated Marketing Communication taught by Ms. Nanagas, a class I was initially hesitant on taking because it’s 3 hours on a Saturday morning. But I don’t mind saying goodbye to Friday nights and sleep-in-Saturday mornings if I have teachers who are great and fun educators.

Secondly, I’ve begun exercising again with Selina & Arbie to accompany me as running buddies. I’ve already conquered my first 5km straight! I now regularly run 4-5km straight (that’s 20-25 laps around Moro!) every week.

What amazes me is that 1. I’ve never been able to run this consistently and far before 2. I’m running without an ipod 3.I’m genuinely enjoying it! It’s one of those things that you completely do for yourself in your own time.

Eating at BURGER PROJECT, Maginhawa St. for lunch. SO GOOD.

Thirdly, I love my friends. From late night Amarreto Sour nights with my 2 bestfriends, visiting Gabe at the hospital,  and lunch dates, its been a laugh trip all the way. This is what I love about junior year – finally being settled & satisfied with some consistency.

With my 2 bestfriends on a different night but where we're equally as crazy as we usually are

This semester is all about food for thought, with school, my self, and my friends. So excuse me as I help myself to more servings!